After the massacre, White Army investigators went into the Ipatiev Mansion and found the following unfinished letter, which Dr. Botkin had begun writing to his brother Alexander only minutes before the executioner Yakov Yurovsky knocked on the door:
“I am making a last attempt at writing a real letter – at least from here – although that qualification, I believe, is utterly superfluous. I do not think that I was fated at any time to write to anyone from anywhere.My voluntary confinement here is restricted less by time than by my earthly existence. In essence I am dead – dead for my children – dead for my work … I am dead but not yet buried, or buried alive – whichever, the consequences are nearly identical …The day before yesterday, as I was calmly reading … I saw a reduced vision of my son Yuri's [George’s] face, but dead, in a horizontal position, his eyes closed. Yesterday, at the same reading, I suddenly heard a word that sounded like Papulya. I nearly burst into sobs.Again – this is not a hallucination because the word was pronounced, the voice was similar, and I did not doubt for an instant that my daughter, who was supposed to be in Tobolsk, was talking to me … I will probably never hear that voice so dear or feel that touch so dear with which my little children so spoiled me …If faith without works is dead, then deeds can live without faith [and if some of us have deeds and faith together, that is only by the special grace of God. I became one of these lucky ones through a heavy burden – the loss of my first born, six-month old Serzhi*] …This vindicates my last decision … when I unhesitatingly orphaned my own children in order to carry out my physician's duty to the end, as Abraham did not hesitate at God's demand to sacrifice his only son.”
At that time, Yuri (George) was not dead- he would die years later in W.W. II but his son Dmitri had been killed fighting, and haunted Dr.Botkin. The doctor had seen other phantoms- the group of five students from his medical school- all of whom had protested imperialism under Alexander III! and were temporarily expelled from school- had annual reunions which Dr.Botkin attended until 1916- Later, they sent him a group portrait in which he was absent- but placed his image with those who had died! He had an impressive but tragic history - His father had been court physician to both Alexander IIand Alexander III and was a very famous doctor and professor of medicine. Dr.Eugene Botkin, although his political beliefs were more liberal (and he never accepted Rasputin but turned his face away whenever he saw him!) was loyal to the family to the most extreme degree- his wife left him, in part for his constant devotion to the Romanovs and he knew very well he would die with them. His surviving son Gleb and daughter Tatiana also remained enthralled with the Romanovs- even mistakenly identifying Anna Andersen as Anastasia, in the hope that not all their friends had been killed. They were loyal to Anna Andersen to the end.
After the massacre, White Army investigators went into the Ipatiev Mansion and found the following unfinished letter, which Dr. Botkin had begun writing to his brother Alexander only minutes before the executioner Yakov Yurovsky knocked on the door:
“I am making a last attempt at writing a real letter – at least from here – although that qualification, I believe, is utterly superfluous. I do not think that I was fated at any time to write to anyone from anywhere.My voluntary confinement here is restricted less by time than by my earthly existence. In essence I am dead – dead for my children – dead for my work … I am dead but not yet buried, or buried alive – whichever, the consequences are nearly identical …The day before yesterday, as I was calmly reading … I saw a reduced vision of my son Yuri's [George’s] face, but dead, in a horizontal position, his eyes closed. Yesterday, at the same reading, I suddenly heard a word that sounded like Papulya. I nearly burst into sobs.Again – this is not a hallucination because the word was pronounced, the voice was similar, and I did not doubt for an instant that my daughter, who was supposed to be in Tobolsk, was talking to me … I will probably never hear that voice so dear or feel that touch so dear with which my little children so spoiled me …If faith without works is dead, then deeds can live without faith [and if some of us have deeds and faith together, that is only by the special grace of God. I became one of these lucky ones through a heavy burden – the loss of my first born, six-month old Serzhi*] …This vindicates my last decision … when I unhesitatingly orphaned my own children in order to carry out my physician's duty to the end, as Abraham did not hesitate at God's demand to sacrifice his only son.”
At that time, Yuri (George) was not dead- he would die years later in W.W. II but his son Dmitri had been killed fighting, and haunted Dr.Botkin. The doctor had seen other phantoms- the group of five students from his medical school- all of whom had protested imperialism under Alexander III! and were temporarily expelled from school- had annual reunions which Dr.Botkin attended until 1916- Later, they sent him a group portrait in which he was absent- but placed his image with those who had died! He had an impressive but tragic history - His father had been court physician to both Alexander IIand Alexander III and was a very famous doctor and professor of medicine. Dr.Eugene Botkin, although his political beliefs were more liberal (and he never accepted Rasputin but turned his face away whenever he saw him!) was loyal to the family to the most extreme degree- his wife left him, in part for his constant devotion to the Romanovs and he knew very well he would die with them. His surviving son Gleb and daughter Tatiana also remained enthralled with the Romanovs- even mistakenly identifying Anna Andersen as Anastasia, in the hope that not all their friends had been killed. They were loyal to Anna Andersen to the end.